Arguing vs. Debating

               It's time everyone realizes that each and everyone of us are different in our own ways. We think differently and we act differently. I promise you, there is no one, NO ONE, in this world that thinks and acts EXACTLY like you. Yes, you are indeed very unique! As our self esteem may rise knowing that we are one of a kind, but we also need to respect the fact that other people are one of their kinds. 
               Most often, when we disagree with someone, we want to manipulate their thinking. All of us want everyone else in the world to think like us. Even though, by the fact that we are unique makes us feel special, we fear being unique. When someone says, "oh! you are special, I have never seen someone like you." You get the warm feeling inside but when you think for yourself that there is no one else in the world that thinks like, you get afraid. You are afraid of being right or wrong, or may be if someone else is wrong. So most often you want someone else to think like you, so you don't feel 'alone' in this world, and also in some cases, one would adapt to someone else's believes. 
               There is nothing wrong with having different opinions from someone else, and that's why they are called opinions and not facts. It's also for our benefit that someone else thinks differently from you - you get more perspectives than your own. That's when you get more knowledgeable and you not only learn more about the subject but also about the other person.


Disagreement leads to stronger bonding. 


               The goal of an argument is victory. You want to win the argument - it doesn't matter to you if you are right or wrong, but you want to win the argument. There are usually two ways that people reach that ultimate goal, one way is: one rambles soooooo much that the other person has to give up arguing and then the one that rambled "won." Another way is: just say random things that might/might not make any sense and confuse the other, and then consider that you won the argument. There is no beauty in either way; it's all about your own selfishness. I guess a better word to use here would be: a fight.
               Another form of argument is debate. I consider debate as an art - an art of discussing. Debating involves a lot of mental maturity - one has to be able to agree to disagree. There is no 'agree to disagree' concept in arguing. Debating requires knowledge about the subject; it's impossible to debate without having any knowledge. Debating leads to a more open relationship. It's when two people open up to each other and respect others opinions. In debates, you realize that there is a disagreement between two point and you simply prove your point and the other side does the same and then both sides try to understand each other and try to find the common ground. It's a lot more knowledgeable than arguing. 


Disagreements might lead to stronger bonds, but arguments lead to weaker bonds, and debating leads to more mature and open bonds.